This Magic Monday, we look at some of the reasons we struggle to ask others for help and the things we can do to overcome that hesitancy.
I believe there is often an unspoken expectation of being perfect – whether it’s an expectation placed on you by others or one that you put on yourself.
Once you are expected to perform exceptionally, there is almost always shame in admitting you feel insecure – that maybe you can’t do this alone. All of us have been helped in some way to reach the place we’re at now in our lives by our families, friends and colleagues. Not a single person in this world enters life without a need for help. So, what gets in the way of our asking for it? Two things come to mind:
- Fear – You’re afraid of showing weakness, overstepping friendships, or appearing needy or incompetent.
- Perception – You’re concerned about what others will think. Will you still be perceived as competent and successful by others? Would you still believe it of yourself?
When it all begins to feel like too much, and you’re unsure how best to proceed, here are a few things you can try to feel more comfortable reaching out for help:
1. Acknowledge Your Need
Just because you have a need doesn’t make you weak. We all need things, and simply because you could do it alone doesn’t mean you should.
2. Continually Build Your Network
We all have gifts. Sometimes not asking for help deprives others of the opportunity to share their strengths and collaborate with you. Take a mental note of certain areas of expertise people around you have and know who to reach out to when – and when your own gifts could aid others.
Trust that most people are more than happy to assist if they can and appreciate the opportunity to collaborate with you.
Asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness – strength that you can acknowledge your humanity and know your limits, inviting teamwork and focusing on progress rather than perfection.
Who will you ask for help today?